30 Celebrities Who Gave Their Kids Really Dumb Names

In case you’re living in a cave somewhere, you’ll probably have noticed there’s a celebrity baby boom going on. In fact, babies have replaced really big bags and silly looking sunglasses as the accessory of choice. Many of these celebrity babies even come with designer names.

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30 Celebrities Who Gave Their Kids Really Dumb Names

1. Bruce Willis and Demi Moore hit the dumb baby name trifecta with their three girls, Rumer Glenn, Scout LaRue and Tallulah Belle. With names like that is it any wonder they’re already spotted engaging in party and club hopping? Neither of them are over 21, either. This trio is destined to be famous for being famous. Not an after school job in the lot.
2. Bob Geldof and the late Paula Yates apparently wanted kids who would be teased mercilessly at school. The achieved this goal after they named their kids Peaches Honeyblossom, Fifi Trixibelle and Little Pixie Geldof.
3. You wouldn’t expect a mainstream baby name from Casey Affleck and Summer Phoenix. they named their son Indiana August Affleck. Now there’s a state I’d name my kid after.
4. Considering Alice Cooper’s stage show, it’s rather surprising he named his daughter Calico Dashiell. It could have been worse though, he could have named her Guillotine.
5. Michael Jackson thought Prince Michael had such a great ring to it, he used it to name both his sons. But don’t worry, he differentiates by calling his youngest boy “Blanket.” Daughter Paris is almost normal by comparison.
6. Perhaps Sonny and Cher were hoping for a pole dancer when they named their daughter Chastity. Alas, it wasn’t meant to be.
7. Courtney Cox and David Arquette also have a daughter who won’t have to change her name if she decides to pursue a career in the adult industry. Coco Riley will do just fine.
8. Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin thought nothing wrong with naming their little girl Apple. Let’s hope she make it through middle school with no permanent damage.
9. Geri Halliwell named her little girl Bluebell Madonna. All I can say it’s a good thing she’ll be rich.
10. Toni Braxton and husband Keri Lewis named their sons after jeans and truck fuel - Denim and Diezel.

Here are more interesting celebrity baby names:

1. No list of unusual celebrity baby names would be complete without a nod to the king of the dumb baby names. The late, great Frank Zappa and his wife Gail named their kids Moon Unit, Dweezil, Diva Muffin and Ahmet.
2. Woody Allen and Mia Farrow- Satchel Seamus and Moses Amadeaus.
3. Cher and Greg Allman - Elijah Blue
4. Valerie Bertinelli and Eddie Van Halen - Wolfgang.
5. Kevin Bacon and Kyra Sedgewick - Sosie Ruth Bacon. Sounds like something you’d make for Sunday brunch.
6. David and Victoria Beckham have a trio of curiously named boys: Brooklyn, Romeo and Cruz.
7. Eryka Badu - Seven Sirius Benjamin.
8. Nicolas Cage & Alice Kim - Kal-El Coppola Cage.
9. Jason Lee - Pilot Inspektor. There are no words.
10. Michael Hutchens and Paula Yates - Heavenly Hiraani Tiger Lily. The mind bogles.
11. Joe Strummer - Jazz Domino
12. The Edge - Blue Angel. She’s going to fly jets.
13. Jermaine Jackson - Jermajesty. No. Really.
14. Penn Jillette - Zoltan and Moxie Crime Fighter.
15. Jamie Olivier - Daisy Boo and Poppy Honey.
16. Simon LeBon - Saffron Sahara, Tallulah Pine and Amber Rose which is quite tame in comparison.
17. Robert Rodriguez - Rocket, Racer, Rebel and Rogue. Guess he’s going for the badass vibe.
18. David Duchovny and Tea Leoni - Kyd. This way if they forget the name and yell “hey kid!” they have the right child.
19. Sylvestor Stallone - Sage Moonblood.
20. Bono - Memphis Eve. I hear he’s not much of a morning person.

Please note Zowie Bowie is not on this list. That’s because his real name is Duncan Zowie Haywood Jones, and Duncan Jones isn’t a dumb name.

To be continued…

Image: PR Photos

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