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June 12, 2008

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Paris Hilton Put the Moves on Cap’n Crunch! 0

Paris Hilton to host new reality show about her dogs. Next year, her pussy? • Paris Hilton uses her powerful reasoning skills to defend her neglected, little ones • After signing autographs in South Africa, Paris Hilton wonders why no one is paying for them • more

June 4, 2008

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NASA Top Secret: Space Geeks Like to Play, Too 0

McCain doesn’t use protection • Thandie Newton - the Secretary of State with Bush • Britney’s Response to McCain Ad? • more

May 23, 2008

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Adam Sandler’s wife isn’t just throwing up because of the Zohan movie 1

Does Adam Sevani support Hamas? • You want to pick up a hot celebrity chick. Do you A) Make a movie, B) Star in a movie, or C) Work as a grip in a movie? • After 19 years of marriage, Robin Williams no longer turns on his wife. All she sees is flubber • more

May 19, 2008

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Pete Doherty Playing With Wino’s Pussy 0

Potty Pete Doherty helps Scientology gain ground to Fictionology • Wino to duet with Dreamy. Event sponsored by penicillin • Bad: Flushing the Koran. Worse: Pete Doherty reading it. • more

May 16, 2008

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Is Angelina Jolie Giving Birth To A Panda? 0

Scarlett Johansson can now empathize with Chinese earthquake victims after Cannes debacle • Fat and Jolie • Sean Penn shouldn’t be sucking on one • more

Angelina breasts will be off limits to Brad around August 0

Angelina Jolie, the new Robin Hood of Hollywood, steals from the rich - Jennifer Anniston - and gives to the poor • Angelina Jolie now has 3 twats, not including Brad • Brangelina weds, changes name to Pittjolie • more

Turns out Jake Gyllenhaal can quit Ennis 0

On Howard Stern show, Ryan Phillippe wishes his ex wife Reese Witherspoon happiness with her new boyfriend Jake Gyllenhaal. Phony tag rolls eyes at saintly tag • Erections lasting more than 82 years, although rare, may require medical attention • The “G” stands for G-String in GOP • more

May 15, 2008

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Nick likes Mariah’s magic mountains 0

Nick Hogan Knows Best How To Ruin Lives • Now Out of Solitary, Nick Hogan Can Give His Hand a Rest • This edition of People has pics of Mariah and Nick’s wedding; divorce pics in next edition • more

May 14, 2008

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Pete Wentz will attempt suicide again this Sunday 0

Pete Wentz fingers his own orifice • Pete Wentz Excited To Give His Kid An Emo Haircut And Tight Girl Diapers • Pete Wentz to have a girl, and someone to share tampons with • more

May 13, 2008

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George gives away Jenna’s bush 0

Payback For Martha: U.S. Refuses Boy George • If you really care about making this country great you’re not going to be friends with a preacher who preaches that “America’s chickens are coming home to roost” the Sunday after the 9/11 attacks • Blogger lists 3 things that we don’t know about George Clooney. Didn’t mention that Clooney is like Kate Beckinsale in that he too likes vagina more than sushi • more

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